Banned From PyCon

TTTO “Banned from Argo” by Leslie Fish

When we arrived in PyCon, we saw all the Python stars

Sitting and conversing in the hotel lounge bar

We had high expectations of their hospitality

But found too late it wasn’t geared for hackers such as we

[Chorus]

And we’re banned from PyCon, that’s too bad

Banned from PyCon, and the lot of us are sad

Tutorials and sprints, and open spaces – we want more

But PyCon just won’t let us in the door

Though Python’s pretty simple, we all want it more complex

We wrote a PEP describing a new method – __sex__ (Prounounced “under-sex”)

They told us it’s no good, and that it doesn’t stand a chance

Especially the part where we proposed __romance__

We all like drinking beers, and we all like to share them too

Bought round after round for the whole commiter crew

The team had started coding when the bar announced “last call”

It might explain the errors when I try the new install

Python’s quite high-level, so we thought it wasn’t green

To write Python in Python – oh, please, really, it’s obscene

Now the PyPy bunch is after us, we’re much the worst for wear

Italian, Dutch and Polish – in all those they know to swear!

We asked a simple question, “Why Mercurial, not Bazaar”

“From features that we needed it just doesn’t seem to far”

“Or Git, or SVN, or something else without a doubt!”

So all the core commiters beat us up and kicked us out

We asked around, because we saw that nobody quite gets

The proper way of using Twisted writing programs net-

working, so we said “we’ll just redo it, to be clean”

The will is there but the code is not, our blog’s what people’ve seen

We love to love humanity, we love the peace and quiet

But we could not pass up the chance to incite Perl 6 to riot

And so they challenged Guido, and the rest is history–

With pies that fly about as we sat and drunk our tea

We love to use the wireless, and the wireless loves us too

But only when it’s tummy doing what they know to do

For otherwise the networking won’t work, yes, such is life

6 gadgets for each geek will make the air with wi-fi rife

A bunch of Ruby people and nobody seemed to care

They came in for our summit, but we wondered how they dare

We made some fun of RoR but they don’t want to play

So when they started the stampede we turned and ran away

We like to code in Python and this hobby we don’t hide

And having fun in PyCon was a joyful funny ride

We’re sorry ‘bout the trouble, didn’t mean to cause a fuss

At least we’re sure that PyCon won’t be quick forgetting us